FNN: Man Sets Turkey Record
kosmo - See all 353 of my articles
2 Comments
Brought to you by the Fake News Network.
POCATELLO (FNN) An Idaho man recently broke a long standing record for turkey consumption. Local welder Gerald Cooper ate turkey three times a day for 366 straight days – an incredible 1098 consecutive meals. More incredibly, all of the turkey was prepared for Thanksgiving 2008! FNN sent reporter Scoop Chevelle to Pocatello to get the scoop.
SCOOP: Wow, Gerald. Color me impressed. What inspired you to do this?
COOP: Well, Scoop, it really started by accident. Wal-Mart had this great deal on turkeys, so I bought a bunch. I planned a huge party for turkey day last year. Hundreds of my closest friends and 600 pounds of turkey. Unfortunately, I was a bit drunk when I sent the invitations. In hindsight, the mailbox I put them into may have been a storm drain. The end result is that nobody showed up.
SCOOP: So you were left with 600 pounds of turkey and decided to eat all of it yourself?
COOP: Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Hey, I have a couple of big deep freezes, so I just tossed the leftovers into the iceboxes. Really, it wasn’t bad for the first few months. Obviously, Idaho has the best potatoes in the world – yeah, I see you Ireland. Bring it ON! The cranberries did get a bit gamey after the first week, though.
SCOOP: How have you kept from getting sick of turkey every day?
COOP: For the first six months, I just had plain old turkey sandwiches. Then I began to mix it up a bit. Turkey chili, turkey stroganoff, turkey energy shakes, turkey whiskey, turkey waffles, turkey tacos, turkey thermidor.
SCOOP: Have you ever come close to missing a meal?
COOP: Yes – May 18th was extremely close. I was a bit hung over, and it was 11:30 by the time I realized that I hadn’t had my breakfast yet. I snuck it in just under the wire. Hey, as long as you’re done before noon, it counts as breakfast.
SCOOP: How much turkey is left?
COOP: Happily, none. I had a handful of friends over last night, and we polished off the last 20 pounds.
SCOOP: So, are you looking forward to Thanksgiving 2010?
COOP: I think I’m having ham next year.
Comments
2 Responses to “FNN: Man Sets Turkey Record”
Leave a Reply
Set up a customized icon to appear next to your comments! Is your comment not appearing? Don't worry - I'm not censoring you. Your comment just got caught in my spam filter. It will be viewable shortly (almost always within 24 hours, and much more quickly 90% of the time).Copyright for all content belongs to the writer identified in the byline. Copyright for any content not associated with a particular writer belongs to Kosmo. Copyright for comments belongs to the writer of the comment.
Content from The Casual Observer cannot be reused in any manner other than what is allowed under the fair use doctrine of US copyright law or the applicable copyright laws of your country.
© 2008-2010. All rights reserved.
Please email Kosmo at Kosmo@ObservingCasually.com with any questions you may have.
Irrational Family
Category
Archives
SWAG (Sassy, Wise, And Grown up)
Recent Posts
Lazy Man and Money
Search by Writer
Blogs run by our writers
Financial Blogs
Fun Blogs
November 27th, 2009 @ 7:11 am
Kosmo, thank you so much for taking the time to leave a detailed response for me over at problogger. It was super kind of you and the information was super helpful. I will consider the e-book after all!
~Justine
Total Comment by Justine Smith: 1
November 30th, 2009 @ 8:06 am
[...] FNN: Man Sets Turkey Record [...]